Compassionate Thickburger

2004.09.03

in Uncategorized

governor_thickburger

Hardee’s marketing efforts lately have focused on their Thickburger menu, which includes such items as the Western Bacon Thickburger and Low Carb Thickburger. However, the campaign is slowing and they need an infusion of creative. Please contribute your suggestions for new Thickburgers. Ideas include:

Swift Boat Thickburger
The War Against Terror Thickburger
Alternative Lifestyles Thickburger
Lance Armstrong’s Triumph Over Cancer Thickburger
Alan Thickeburger

  • Gilbert Giddyup

    I’m not going to have my commitment to feed this country questioned by those who refused to serve burgers when they could have and by those who have misled the nation into McDonald’s.

  • wfty

    When in doubt, segment your market. For Hope, Arkansas, the SlickThickburger; for UN weapons inspectors, the BlickThickburger; for Mia Hamm devotees, the KickThickburger; for the North Pole, the NickThickburger: for the Carolina Hurricanes, the StickThickburger; for the Rocky Mountains, the TickThickburger; for the politically incorrect in Ireland, the MickThickburger; for people with colds in their chests, the VickThickburger; for people who are tired of this and want to return to the home page, the ClickThickburger.

  • mck

    The Shock and Awe Burger ?

  • lumpy

    did you forget the Post-op Clinton Thickburger?

  • pbbbbb

    They considered that one, but Quadruple Bypass Thickburger seemed redundant.

  • http://archerpelican.typepad.com Phil

    “Alan Thickeburger”?! OMFG.

    Hey, and you do know that he composed theme songs for “Diff’rent Strokes,” “The Facts of Life,” and several other shows, right? Right?

  • http://jacksonscott.com Jackson Scott

    No explanation needed:

    Totallysick Thickburger
    Kingsvelte Thickburger

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